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Mesmer

When I heard there was a movie starring Hot Bad Guy Alan Rickman in which he plays Dr. Mesmer, a proponent of animal magnetism, my response was “where do I sign up?” You mean, listen to Alan Rickman talk for a couple of hours while wearing 18th century clothing and talking about passions and forces beyond our control? Well, okay then!

Of course, then I actually had to watch Mesmer, which, I must say, ruined the anticipation rather dramatically. Naturally, nothing on screen could ever live up to the Movie in my Head, in which Alan Rickman reads to me personally, but this was even more of a disappointment than the one for which I was prepared.

Here’s the Short Story: Alan Rickman plays Dr. Franz Anton Mesmer, an 18th century doctor in Vienna, who develops this theory about magnetism being the Cure for All Ills. He demonstrates this after a blind pianist goes nuts during one of her concerts. She’s cured and the two develop a, er, close relationship, much to the chagrin of Mrs. Mesmer, who clearly holds the purse strings in that relationship. Dr. Mesmer is eventually declared a fraud and banished from Vienna. He goes to Paris, where he becomes a court favorite. The movie just kind of peters out toward the end, though.

One thing that did shock me about this movie was the fact that poor Alan Rickman was mumbling through the whole movie. I had the volume turned Way Up on the television and I still missed half the dialogue. Maybe the director did it to him, because I’ve never had that problem in any of his other movies, but you’d think the sound guy would have said something, like, dude, just because you’re supposed to be mesmerizing doesn’t mean you can Speak the Hell Up.

A serious positive, though, was the costuming. Dear God, was it fabulous. Everyone should wear 18th Century Viennese costumes. All The Time. Those fitted waistcoats and long flowing capes. Hell Yes. Mr. Rickman look fantastic! For that alone, consider watching it, but if you actually want to hear his voice, listen to track four of this. Alan Rickman reading a Shakespearean sonnet. Yeah, that’s how I’d like to be mesmerized.